‘Fake it till you make it’, some of us have made this phrase our mantra for life. It’s strange how the mind works. If you portray that you are strong, confident, competent and optimistic even if you feel nothing like that, you eventually get there and become what you believe, even if you are unsure of it at first. After all, thoughts become things. If you think about yourself in a certain way, you start to believe it, so it’s only a matter of time before you become it.
The funny way our brain works
It is a well-known fact that the complexity of the brain is beyond our comprehension; it is beyond anything we have ever imagined. So it’s not easy to decipher how and why our belief system has the power to change our entire outlook on life. Eventually, it all boils down to conditioning.
Say for instance, you have convinced yourself that you are bad in social situations. So naturally, whenever a plan for socializing crops up, you are bound to feel jittery and awkward because that’s what you tell yourself you are as a person, even though you may have the potential of being the life of the party. If a novice who adopts the role of a monk makes it obvious to himself that he is actually that monk, his brain will condition him to act like a monk and he will be accepted as such.
How you can strive to be better
Ask yourself these questions. Are there pieces of yourself you neglected or didn’t nurture along the way? Are there aspects of yourself you discarded? What specific challenges, opportunities or activities you weren’t given a chance to master? Were there life events that interrupted you from showing the world a specific side of yourself? What do you think you required most that you didn’t get?
If there are certain aspects that have led you to lose pieces of yourself, see how you can turn this situation around. The more you learn about yourself, the better you get at changing the way you look at things.
Tackling your negative thoughts
If you are afraid of a situation or thing, merely pretending that you like it isn’t really going to help. However, you can follow this routine. First, take a situation you are struggling with and experiencing negative emotions about. Analyze it and ask yourself why you feel the way you do about it. Pen down your thoughts and check whether you can challenge the way you believe about these things. Devise a new belief system and see if it blends well with your reality. Repeat this over and over again until this routine begins to feel like your new reality.
It can be a task but the best thing about the mind is that it can unlearn a habit just as well as it can pick up on one. Besides, according to the popular saying it only takes 21 days to change a habit, so all you have to do is hang in there.
Your attitude and the way you think are more powerful than you can imagine. If you only knew the power of your thoughts and how they can influence your actions, you wouldn’t catch yourself being critical, judgmental or negative about yourself ever again.